Where does indifference come from? Permission to express emotions. Where do indifference and cruelty come from? What is indifference and indifference

Indifference is indifference, a cold-blooded attitude to the need and troubles that have arisen in someone's life. The manifestation of indifference is described as the main evil of our time and the reaction to it must be immediate, since this phenomenon, unfortunately, takes root in our environment. Indifference borders on insensitivity, apathy and becomes a common problem, and this can provoke Negative consequences In human life. Moving away from problems strangers, we try to save ourselves according to the rule: if I don’t see a problem, it simply doesn’t exist.

What is indifference

Considering the phenomenon of indifference, one must take into account that the choice of the individual is fully realized, this is a complete avoidance of taking part in any actions that do not concern him. This is either a refusal to help, or an inability to show support and compassion at a moment of extreme need to help people. First of all, it encourages this behavior before obligations. The result of an invasion of the vital activity of outsiders may be unwanted reactions, and the goodness shown by you sincerely and disinterestedly may turn against you. But there are always risks, making any decision, we are responsible for the future consequences. So is it worth it to reject people who need us?

Experiencing the indifference shown by others to us, we experience grief and stop believing in humanity, it is not easy then to trust again what to talk about helping others when we ourselves did not receive it in time. By refusing to help, remaining indifferent, we run the risk of experiencing a sense of guilt over time, which will leave a detrimental imprint on our lives. Why carry the burden of guilt with you? When there is an opportunity to do good and live with faith that everything possible has been done.

However, indifference can occur in absolutely everyone, regardless of character and values. The reason for this behavior sometimes becomes banal boredom. Boredom can cause a sluggish depressive state, experiencing it, the individual does not have the necessary amount of internal resources to show assistance in the problems of others. To overcome boredom, a business that you will be doing separately from work or study will help, to find a business that has become an outlet and will begin to fill you with positive energy and strength, it is very important. This is due to age, so you can look for a kind of activity that will bring happiness at any period of life, as well as change it in the future.

Human behavior as a social being is strictly regulated by a certain number of hereditary factors. The interaction of the subject with society is a reflection of its features.

To raise a caring person, parents should talk with their child about the manifestation of indifference in life, give examples, discuss various situations and discuss how compassion, mutual assistance and understanding can be shown. Track the manifestation of indifference in your child, perhaps by analyzing his interests and hobbies. If there are none, it is advisable to start looking for a favorite activity together, because responsiveness to people is possible when a person develops harmoniously in all areas.

Reasons for indifference

Where does indifference come from, what exactly caused it to develop in people? There are factors after which the subject decides to be deaf and blind in certain situations. Let's look at some of the reasons. A prolonged feeling of stress and anxiety makes a person emotionally exhausted and incapable of additional experiences. Such individuals are characterized by apathy and passivity.

The next reason for the emergence of indifference is sticking to one's own problems, an unshakable belief that others simply cannot have something that is worth paying attention to. All other people's problems are leveled and depreciated, and the person himself is inclined to the constant position of the victim and expects pity and support only for himself. Most often people who are indifferent do not see themselves as such, even more, many of them are quite sure that they are soft and sympathetic.

Also, a large number of experienced misfortunes can make any person more rigid and detached from other people's troubles. Although, it would seem, on the contrary, the one who has experienced such a situation is best able to show responsiveness, unfortunately this is not always the case.

Our psyche tends to protect us from repeating traumatic situations that once happened, so a person, as it were, moves away from everything that reminds him of what he experienced. But this happens on, consciously, the person is sure that he is absolutely not interested in delving into other people's affairs. And sometimes, there are circumstances in which a person who has not had such sad situations is simply not able to feel the grief of others. But a similar reaction is most often characteristic of adolescents, when childish naivety and all-encompassing love have passed, and life experience is still not enough to adequately assess the current situation.

In addition to the described global reasons, there are situational reasons when a person was simply confused and could not provide help right away, felt bad and did not react properly. Do not rush to condemn others in anything, do not bear the burden of resentment, learn to forgive and give others the opportunity to improve.

What is the danger of indifference

Consider the dangers of indifference. Indifference and responsiveness are opposite concepts in their meaning. If responsiveness can positively affect a person, renew hope for a solution, give strength, then human indifference pushes us to despair and impotence in the face of the wall of troubles that have arisen.

Indifference, a phenomenon that destroys our society, the indifference of one, with a high probability, will affect everyone around. A child who notices indifference in the relationship of parents adopts their model of behavior and in similar situations will behave in the same way. An adult who has felt the indifference of others may one day not help another, feeling resentment, experienced inattention from loved ones and society as a whole.

How often does society look through such global social problems like children abandoned by adults, assault in families, weakness and defenselessness of the elderly. What would happen if we found the strength to solve problems that affected not only our interests? It is likely that there would be less evil that we meet day after day absolutely everywhere.

At the moment of appearance of indifference, humanity loses the ability to empathize, the connection with morality is lost, which, in principle, defines us as a person. These people are filled more with negativity, envy, inability to share not only the suffering of others, but also joy. It is also difficult for such people to show love, inside they can experience this incomprehensible feeling to them, but outwardly they can repel a loved one or even offend. And it all turns into an inextricable circle. A person who does not know how to show love is unlikely to cause a feeling of love in others, this, in turn, will have an even greater impact on his life and lead to loneliness, because it will be very difficult to maintain even ordinary communication with such a person, not that to build a strong family.

Please note that you do not need to take other people's problems too closely into your heart. This is the cause of depression, sadness, emotional instability. Sympathy is wonderful, but even in this feeling there should be boundaries, you should not live with other people's problems. It is very easy to show participation and support, often it is the usual things: help a young mother with a stroller, tell a grandmother with poor eyesight the bus number, help a lost child find their parents, or help a person who feels unwell.

We are often in a hurry, not paying attention to what is happening around us, although sometimes just a minute of our time can cost a person a life. The famous writer Bruno Jasensky in his novel “The Conspiracy of the Indifferent” wrote: “Do not be afraid of your friends - in the worst case, they may betray you, do not be afraid of your enemies - in the worst case, they will try to kill you, but beware of the indifferent - only with their silent blessing there are betrayals and murders on the Earth.

Positive emotions make our life bright and full, try to notice more good things around, show more compassion and help, respond to people with kindness.

Each new generation is obliged to develop through the accumulation of social experience. The interaction of the individual with the social environment is a process of requirements and expectations from both sides. A person is guided by the skills and abilities acquired through direct relationships in social groups. Therefore, having freed ourselves from the burden of resentment and accumulated claims against others, we will free ourselves from such qualities as indifference, indifference and callousness. Give the world good, and the world will definitely give it to you three times over!

Indifference is a state of apathy towards the world around, people, phenomena, events, unwillingness to participate in changing one's own life for the better, lack of concern for other people.

"I don't care... It doesn't concern me... It doesn't interest me... Leave me alone... Don't interfere with me...". Each of us has heard or said such phrases. A person wants to be left alone, he does not want to have anything to do with certain people or events, he cares and is not interested in anything. There are many manifestations of indifference.

Types of indifference

In relationship

Indifference in marriage is a fairly common occurrence. One of the spouses reproaches the other for indifference. The feelings they once had for each other have been swallowed up by the routine of everyday life. Both partners have come to terms with this and continue to live together only out of habit.

The connection of partners with mutual indifference and without the desire to change anything is considered hopeless. In this case, it is necessary not to focus on yourself, but to talk with a partner. You might be better off breaking up.

Attitude towards other people

As a rule, a person is very painfully worried when he feels that he causes boredom and indifference in his partner, that he has become completely uninteresting for him. However, over time, feelings become dull, the pain goes away and only indifference remains. Indifference to a partner often develops into such an attitude towards other people, which negatively affects the whole life of a person and his relationships with others.

Indifference of men

Many young people have a certain form of indifference that is often confused with manhood. Many people think that a real man should be "tough", not show his feelings, so as not to seem weak. Therefore, sometimes young people put on a kind of mask of indifference.

At work

Quite often there is indifference and indifference to work. A person becomes uninteresting in his work, as a result of which he copes worse with his duties and, of course, there can no longer be any question of climbing the career ladder. In this case, the negative consequences of indifference manifest themselves faster and more acutely than in personal life, because today no employer will put up with a disinterested employee who does not maintain good relations with the team, constantly making mistakes.

Towards politics and the environment

Consequences of human passivity in political and social sphere very sad, because in this case, any important issue is decided by other people who have a certain interest. In recent years, the consequences of an indifferent attitude to the destruction of nature have been increasingly felt.

To children

The consequences of the indifferent attitude of parents towards children are especially severe. If parents are indifferent to their own children, who need their love and attention, then over time, children begin to behave aggressively. Even worse, if the children put up with themselves and become indifferent and apathetic to everything.

Reasons for this attitude

Often indifference is a kind of protection that protects a person from stress. If a person has been repeatedly rejected or insulted, then he tries to avoid such negative emotions. Wanting to defend himself, a person often quite unconsciously begins to portray indifference. However, over time, a problem arises, because indifference and indifference often become an internal state of a person. Sometimes there are severe cases of indifferent attitude towards others and oneself. The reasons for this attitude can be mental retardation, long-term painful craving for drugs, drug addiction, alcoholism, as well as mental illness (for example, some forms of psychopathy). Short-term and treatable forms of indifferent and apathetic behavior often occur after shock and severe stress(for example, the death of a loved one), especially in children as a result of parental violence, lack of affection and love.

How to overcome indifference?

In case of painful indifference, depending on the cause, psychotherapy can help, as well as special psychological help services. In addition, every indifferent person should frankly ask himself how he would feel if other people were also indifferent to him. Human life is impossible without love, attention and care, realizing this, it is impossible to remain indifferent.

compassion mercy indifference pragmatism

Indifferent attitude... Indifference... What is it? Where does it come from in people? And if indifference is a diagnosis, then how to treat it?

Recently, indifference is a familiar word. We often hear about him on television and on the radio. It is in the air outside. Everyone is afraid of him, and when faced with him, they do not recognize him.

Because indifference is not a hefty uncle with a bloodied ax in his hands and not a suicide bomber with explosives on his belt, but a little gray man who sits in a corner and quietly reads a newspaper while the uncle with the suicide bomber is operating. He sits and hopes that they will not notice him, he waits for a kind policeman to come and arrest everyone, that everything will be fine without him, and he will only get up in vain ... He will always find a logical explanation for his inaction. After all, he didn't do anything... that.

But is it really so? How does a person who has experienced indifference feel? It methodically kills all life in a person, all feelings, including hope. At the same time, it’s like it has nothing to do with it. That's why it's indifference. No responsibility. No regrets And there's nothing to blame him for, because he didn't do anything. How convenient... how small...

They say indifference is inherited. Indifference is akin to cowardice and meanness. It will never respond to someone else's pain. Just won't hear.

Indifference is the callousness and failure of the human soul. As a rule, indifferent people do not recognize themselves as such, moreover, some of them quite seriously consider themselves romantics. It's funny... By definition, romance is feelings and emotions that elevate a person, it is "characterized by the depiction of strong passions." To put it simply, romance is true love, devoted friendship... So indifference and romance are incompatible.

I would rather classify the indifferent, on the contrary, as pragmatists. But this is also difficult. Because they are nothing, neither this nor that, neither fish nor meat, insipid and tasteless. Sometimes well-read. And even quite emotionally they can retell what they have read or heard. But very soon you begin to realize that these statements contain little personal attitude, and you lose interest.

Indifference is always disguised. It masquerades as all sorts of human feelings. It is deceiving. And she believes in her deceit. And therefore it is not immediately recognizable. And so it is dangerous. Deception and disappointment hurt.

Indifferent people are half-humans, sub-humans, standing at a lower stage of human evolution. And in their essence, they are terrible people, because they lack all the senses except hunger, cold and comfort. Indifference, as such, is cruel. It destroys love, kills faith in people.

Indifference is the state of a person in which he does not show the slightest interest in anything. Synonyms: apathy, indifference, callousness, insensibility, heartlessness, indifference, dispassion, indifference, passivity, soullessness.

Often people call indifference neutrality to sound more decent. However, this does not change the meaning of indifference. Indifference remains indifference.

The world through the eyes of the indifferent:

- My hut is on the edge, I don’t know anything.
- Your shirt is closer to the body.
- After us - at least a flood.
- Our business is a party.
- Although the grass does not grow.
- I don’t delve into anything, such a role is hard for me!

I half listen. This is indifference.

Indifference is indifference. When is a person indifferent to something? In the case when it is not important to him or worthy of his attention. What are the roots of indifference?

-- Pride;
-- Selfishness;
- Love of money;
- Careerism.

Bruno Jasensky (1901-1938), a remarkable Polish and Russian writer, who was shot in the year 38, wrote very correct words in his novel “The Conspiracy of the Indifferent”: “Do not be afraid of your friends - in the worst case, they can betray you, do not be afraid of your enemies - in the worst case, they can kill you, be afraid of the indifferent - only with their tacit consent do betrayals and murders occur on Earth.

No less eloquent was A.P. Chekhov: "Indifference is paralysis of the soul, premature death."

However, all of the above - lyrics, emotions. Someone, perhaps, will take it personally and be indignant, which is not bad. And if he analyzes it, then it’s very good.

Because our medal has a downside. And on the other side, indifference no longer seems such a vice. Indifference can be a manifestation of the so-called alexithymia - a state, although not contagious, but rather intrusive and unhelpful.

People suffering from alexithymia are not able to understand and understand their own feelings and experiences, and therefore, as a result, the emotions of other people are alien to them. Compassion is alien to them, empathy is alien and pity is alien. They lack intuition and imagination. The personality of such people, citing psychology, "is characterized by the primitiveness of life orientation, infantilism and, what is especially important, the insufficiency of the function of reflection."

For reference. Reflection is a return to one's own inner world, to your experience, the ability to comprehend your own actions and their motivation, the ability to understand what you feel and why you feel.

Further, the term alexithymia is specified: “The combination of these qualities leads to excessive pragmatism, the impossibility of a holistic view of one’s own life, a lack of a creative attitude towards it, as well as difficulties and conflicts in interpersonal relationships. This is such a state when a person is not able to see his whole life in one, as well as problems in communicating with other people.

The origin of alexithymia is different. This phenomenon may be congenital. As, for example, a stable quality of a person's personality. And it can have an acquired, i.e. temporary, character. An example is a post-traumatic reaction, a state due to experienced stress, prolonged depression, as a protective reaction of the body to the aggression of the outside world.

One of the reasons may be the lack of warmth, affection, participation in the upbringing of the individual from early childhood. According to statistics, most indifferent people in childhood did not receive maternal love and attention. Often parents, instead of asking the child about what he feels and experiences, not only do not pay attention to it (in other words, remain indifferent), but also teach the child to hide his feelings. Just like that, a healthy child can develop alexithymia, which will subsequently deprive him of many human joys, including the joy of loving and being loved.

Of course, I have not mentioned all the symptoms and manifestations of alexithymia, especially since its severity can be different. Someone sees in it a disease, a mental disorder, someone sees a certain psychological warehouse of a person's personality. But the purpose of this article is not alexithymia, as such, but the essence of human indifference...

In this regard, I want to note that not every indifferent person is affected by alexithymia. Many indifferent people simply pretend to be such or are mentally lazy people who are perfectly aware of the situation, take care of their own feelings, but try once again not to expend energy on another, even close, person. And it's already cruel.

To check for the presence of true indifference, or alexithymia, the Toronto Alexithymic Scale (TAS) helps, a special test consisting of 26 items. Those who are interested can easily find it on the net.

As for the treatment of indifference, there is nothing consoling. Scientists unanimously argue that indifference is not treated. True, some optimists advise using empathy.

And in this regard, one cannot but admit that indifference is pitiable, because the colors of life are inaccessible to indifferent people. They are unable to experience and unable to rejoice. They are incapable of love. And that's why no one likes them either. They are doomed to loneliness. This is an empty flower. They don't have wings...

Ask anyone if he is an indifferent person?

Yes you?! Yes, how can you?! Yes, I'm ready to give my soul, for my neighbor! As a child, I used to translate old ladies across the road! And there are thousands more examples of how he gave way to a pensioner, helped a neighbor to drive a nail into the wall. How nice to feel like a noble and caring person!

Indifference, if you think about it, has a double meaning. Indifference as EQUAL, the same attitude towards “all souls”, that is, to all people without distinction on races, nationalities and other differences that “separate” people, and Indifference as balance, balance, the strength of the soul, which no one and nothing can bring out of balance, harmony.

Well, what's wrong with that? Why are most sayings about indifference negative? After all, they can be interpreted in a diametrically opposite sense. Which is much closer to our current existence.

In America, the principle of relationship (and now in our country) is reflected in one, the most capacious expression: “These are your problems!” Accordingly, “This is NOT my problem!”

Everyone copes with their problems on their own, without "burdening" others with them. To the question "How are you?" here they don’t start talking about problems for a long and tedious time, but they answer briefly and as falsely as possible: “Fine!” Wonderful!

Even if you lost your job yesterday, your car was smashed, and a member of a “racial minority” robbed your wife. Fine! Everything else is my problem. Because YOU, who asked how MY are doing, have their own problems.

I don't know how to help myself, much less how to help you. Therefore, many suggest considering indifference as a disease that appeared in society from hopelessness. It is so easy and so convenient to regard the normal state as abnormal, "sick." It's so uplifting! It is enough to “recover from indifference”, and immediately: “Man is a friend, comrade and sometimes even a brother!”

Indifference is not a disease, it is rather a protection!

Protection from not breaking, not to explode, not to start destroying everyone and everything indiscriminately...

To be sympathetic, not indifferent is too much, an unaffordable luxury in our cruel time. Emotionally react to everything that happens around?

Emotions that are too strong will immediately begin to destroy us. Therefore, we go into indifference, into forgetfulness - just not to react and freak out in vain ... Especially if you feel, you understand that you won’t change anything anyway.

I will open for you terrible secret! There are weapons of mass destruction in the world that hit unmistakably and accurately. And kills on the spot. This is indifference!

It's amazing, but true. And it also works on a global scale.

As for a person, nothing humiliates, revolts and destroys him so much as the indifference of those around him.

Why do you think terrible, eccentric, wonderful, strange acts are committed in the world? Why do people go crazy with ? Why do wars happen, after all? There is only one reason - the initiators and instigators of all this disgrace do not have enough attention to their person.

After all, what is attention? It is a sign of your presence in the world. Even if it is negative attention, anger or resentment. Doesn't matter! You will be noticed. So, you will receive a certain share of social strokes or slaps. That human energy that will give you the strength to live.

“The greatest sin in relation to one's neighbor is not hatred, but indifference. This is truly the pinnacle of inhumanity. After all, my dear, if you look closely at people, you yourself will be surprised how much hate is like love.. Bernard Show.

No wonder they say that from love to hate is one step. And all because both love and are powerful energies of attention to your personality. That is what your being requires.

Sometimes the indifference of others can be a stimulus to development. It makes a person go out of his way to prove his worth. Tell me honestly, have you never done anything to prove that you are smarter, more beautiful, smarter, kinder? “I will prove it to you, you will still cry without me, I will show you again!” - spinning sometimes in the head. Familiar?

I dare to say that most human actions are implicated precisely in this motivation: “I want to be noticed!” "Look at me!" “See how good I am (brave, smart, wise, handsome, etc.)!”

One of the leading human needs is related to recognition. We want others to notice us. Appreciated. Adopted into their flock. Loved it in the end. We want to be loved!

Sometimes, in order to experience this feeling, even if it is deceitful, we are ready to humiliate ourselves and ask. Get addicted and forget about our own needs, devoting ourselves to the one we love. But try to honestly answer the question: “Are you doing this for him or for yourself?” Just be honest. Even in love, we are often focused on our own experiences, our own sacrifices, which must be rewarded. And if they are not rewarded and loved ones show us indifference or inattention, we suffer.

Oh, this is truly a terrible weapon. And in every sense. It can even be said that this is a terrible devilish weapon with which people are able to destroy life itself (if they are indifferent to the problems of the Earth).

What do we know about indifference?

Firstly indifference is worse than hatred. It is the most brutal weapon imaginable. If you don't know how to defeat your enemies, you can kill them in a simple and affordable way. Ignore. Complete and final. One that automatically turns a living, warm person into an empty place. Not even a corpse, but simply nothing. Remember that this is a very cruel and inhuman weapon.

Secondly, promotes the spread of evil. "Do not be afraid of enemies - in the worst case, they can kill you. Do not be afraid of friends - in the worst case, they can betray you. Be afraid of the indifferent - they do not kill or betray, but only with their silent consent there is betrayal and murder on earth."(American poet Richard Eberhart).

Thirdly, indifference is a killer. It destroys desires and dreams. The indifferent turns into a living corpse, which nothing holds on this planet. As a rule, such people die.

Indifference to a person on the part of others can lead to his illness and death. Especially if he fails to win attention, even negative. And not knowing how to achieve positive attention and love, each outcast will strive with all his might to achieve at least some, even the opposite effect. Because this is also a result proving to him that he exists!

Fourth, indifference as a way to get away from the frailty of existence has nothing to do with indifference-emptiness, which is discussed in this article. The so-called enlightenment, liberation from thoughts and passions, the emptiness to which Buddhist monks aspire is only a way to be filled with a higher meaning. But not indifference.

Don't create voids

Everyone knows the rule of communicating vessels? The law of filling voids requires that there be no void. If we create it, we are killing ourselves. "There are two ways to kill yourself - suicide and indifference". (Jonathan Coe).

Therefore, use this terrible weapon very carefully. Yes, of course, for some time you can send all your virtual or real offenders to ignore. But time will pass, and the empty space may be filled with new trolls. Therefore, indifference is only a temporary, tactical move. Signaling to someone who misbehaves that he is wrong.

Many people are kept in the tonus of life by only one attentive look of a complete stranger. Think about it. And look around with that attentive and kind look.

Our main strategy should remain And indifference is not characteristic of it by definition.

Indifferent attitude... Indifference... What is it? Where does it come from in people? And if indifference is a diagnosis, then how to treat it?

Because indifference is not a hefty uncle with a bloodied ax in his hands and not a suicide bomber with explosives on his belt, but a small gray man who sits in a corner and quietly reads a newspaper while the uncle with the suicide bomber is operating. He sits and hopes that they will not notice him, he waits for a kind policeman to come and arrest everyone, that everything will be fine without him, and he will only get up in vain ... He will always find a logical explanation for his inaction. After all, he didn't do anything... that.

They say indifference is inherited. Indifference is akin to cowardice and meanness. It will never respond to someone else's pain. Just won't hear.

Bruno Jasensky (1901-1938), a remarkable Polish and Russian writer, shot in the year 1938, wrote very correct words in his novel The Conspiracy of the Indifferent:
"Do not be afraid of your friends - in the worst case, they can betray you, do not be afraid of your enemies - in the worst case, they can kill you, be afraid of the indifferent - only with their tacit consent do betrayals and murders occur on Earth."

No less eloquent was A.P. Chekhov: "Indifference is paralysis of the soul, premature death."

However, all of the above - lyrics, emotions. Someone, perhaps, will take it personally and be indignant, which is not bad. And if he analyzes it, then it’s very good.

Because our medal has a downside. And on the other side, indifference no longer seems such a vice. Indifference can be a manifestation of the so-called alexithymia- a condition, although not contagious, but rather intrusive and unprofitable.

For reference. Reflection is an appeal to your inner world, to your experience, the ability to comprehend your own actions and their motivation, the ability to understand what you feel and why you feel.

The term alexithymia is further specified: "The combination of these qualities leads to excessive pragmatism, the impossibility of a holistic view of one's own life, a lack of a creative attitude towards it, as well as difficulties and conflicts in interpersonal relationships."

Doesn't this remind you of anything?

Of course, I have not mentioned all the symptoms and manifestations of alexithymia, especially since its severity can be different. Someone sees in it a disease, a mental disorder, someone sees a certain psychological warehouse of a person’s personality. But the purpose of this article is not alexithymia, as such, but the essence of human indifference...

Checking for true indifference, or alexithymia, helps Toronto Alexithymic Scale (TAS)- a special test consisting of 26 items. Those who are interested can easily find it on the net.

As for the treatment of indifference, there is nothing consoling. Scientists unanimously argue that indifference is not treated. True, some optimists advise using empathy.

And they don't care anyway...