Why do we need enemies? Why love your enemies and turn the other cheek “oh god, make my enemies funny!” Voltaire

Jesus wasn't the only one who called for loving your enemies. Buddhists say that a person's best teachers are his enemies, and Lao Tzu taught that "there is no greater misfortune than hating an enemy."

Why love your enemies?

Why do people have enemies? Who is the enemy?

Firstly, people themselves are the reason that the enemy appeared. Every person is to some extent responsible for the evil that exists in the world. This can be seen both in history and in relationships between people. There are people who have many enemies, there are people who, it seems, in principle, cannot have enemies. Every person from time to time becomes a participant in conflict, rivalry, or some other hostility on the part of other people. But individual conflicts are successfully resolved if the conflict is resolved on the basis of reason, and enemies cease to be enemies. And some enemies are not enemies for life. Not a single enemy appears out of nowhere, without a corresponding reason. This means that the person himself is to blame for having an enemy. And if so, then if you get rid of the enemy, another will appear. And it is wrong to say that “no person, no problem.”

N. Berdyaev says that even the cause of war is in the people themselves. “The evil of war is a sign of the internal illness of humanity. Material violence and the horrors of war are just a rash on the body of humanity, which cannot be gotten rid of externally and mechanically. We are all to blame for the illness of humanity that comes with war” (N. Berdyaev, “The Fate of Russia”) . “War is not a source of evil, but only a reflex to evil, a sign of the existence of internal evil and illness. This is the nature of any material violence - it is always secondary, not primary” (N. Berdyaev, ibid.). “War only reveals evil, it throws it out. The external fact of physical violence and physical murder cannot be considered as an independent evil, as a source of evil” (N. Berdyaev, ibid.).

Secondly, everything in nature is interconnected, and our hatred in response to someone else’s hatred only increases hatred. And evil in response to evil only increases it. It is impossible to defeat evil with evil. Hatred multiplies hatred; violence multiplies violence, and cruelty multiplies cruelty, multiplying the processes of destruction. The most big misconception, because of which a lot of evil has come into the world, is that it is supposedly possible to do evil with impunity. Any evil boomerangs back to the one who does it, “what a man sows, that he will also reap.”

Hegel, Philosophy of Religion, said that “there is no innocent suffering, suffering is always guilt.” And people who seem like innocent victims still feel guilty and behave accordingly. There is no one who is free from mistakes. Healers say that the person who has become a victim of some crime on the physical plane is a robber on the subtle plane. Because he himself attracted the criminal to himself with his negativity. What a person does in this life is what they will do to him in the next.

Third, why is it better to love your enemies?

Loving enemies is not the same as loving, for example, children or parents. Loving your enemies does not mean declaring your love for them, but not feeling hatred for them, realizing that you yourself are to blame for the fact that they appeared. The reason for the negative attitude of other people towards us is the negativity in us, which is better to get rid of, abandon, so that it does not cause new problems or illnesses.

“The theme of evil is the main theme of life. A merciless and evil attitude towards evil and the evil can turn into new evil, and often did. The merciless destruction of evil and revenge on the evil gives rise to more and more new evil. A person finds himself in a hopeless circle. The Gospel theme about attitude towards enemies is another expression of attitude towards the evil." Further, N. Berdyaev writes that the Creator should not eliminate evil by an act of force. Way to better life lies only through development, the main thing in which is the renunciation of evil, i.e. selfishness, hatred.

Psychiatrists believe that hatred is the cause of many of our diseases and negative conditions. Healers see even more who say that hatred destroys our health, personality and destiny, and love, as the absence of hatred, anger, irritability, has a positive effect on our health and condition, and that learning to love is learning to be healthy.

Humanity has been walking in a vicious circle at one level, where hatred gives birth to new hatred, wars give birth to new wars, for many thousands of years. And he will walk exactly until he turns to reason. If you respond to hatred with hatred, then it multiplies, and then there will be more and more enemies. And only reason, which comes from love, helps to smooth out conflicts, reconcile enemies, prevent war, and avoid other dead ends into which homosapiens has driven itself. It was the absence of both reason and love that led humanity to the impasse in which it now finds itself. And the way out of this impasse is to renounce hatred and turn to reason, and everyone will benefit from this.

Jesus, when he called to “Love your enemies,” and Lao Tzu, when he called for the same, and the Buddhists, who say that a person’s best teachers are his enemies, said that it is better to resolve all issues by turning to reason, mutual respect, giving up hatred. Man has two natures – the lower, animal, and the higher, spiritual. And hatred just comes from his animal nature, and love, mutual understanding, the desire to resolve conflicts comes from his spiritual nature. And to refrain from hatred and show love means to rise above your lower nature, to go in the direction of self-realization.

Loving your enemies means not returning evil for evil. It is better for everyone to be rational and solve issues based on reason. If all people tried to do this, then history would have taken a different path long ago, and no one would have had enemies.

And it’s already clearer why it’s better to turn the other cheek. “But I say to you, do not resist evil. But whoever strikes you on your right cheek, turn to him the other also” (Matthew 5:38-39). Do not return evil for evil, do not multiply the evil that human society there was always enough.

Many cannot accept the Teachings of Christ because they do not understand it. What does it mean to turn the other cheek? Situations that happen to a person happen not only “why”, but also “for what”. If the boss calls you “on the carpet”, or at home the husband or wife begins to scold him, it means, firstly, there is something for it, and you need to, knowing that there is a reason, without falling into feelings, without being offended or condemning, to rise above the situation , show reason, tolerance towards people and the situation and find a reasonable way out.

Eat different level development of people and, accordingly, different levels of understanding of what is happening. N. Berdyaev, “On the purpose of man,” says: “You can turn the cheek to the offender only in a grace-filled manner, as a spiritual feat and enlightenment, as the discovery of a force greater than that which is found in physical violence against the offender, in a duel.” A coward may not respond to an insult, but more high level not responding to an insult with an insult is a spiritual feat - like understanding that if a person is insulted, then he himself is to blame, and the correct, reasonable action is not repaying evil for evil, but reducing evil, a reasonable solution to the conflict. Stopping a scoundrel, standing up for yourself and others, restoring justice has always been considered valor and heroism and has always earned respect. There is more high level compared, for example, with cowardice or indifference. But an even higher level is, as Jesus taught, to love your enemies. The desire to “not get involved” is not a higher level, because it is contempt. Enemies are considered to be those people who bring trouble and problems. But people have problems as a sign of their imperfection, and the problem indicates this departure. Love for the enemy manifests itself at a higher level of human development.

A person at any level can act wisely, this will be the best way out for him. Jesus asked for his tormentors: “Father! Forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”

“A man who has no enemies is truly poor,” Bernard Shaw once said and immediately became three times richer. The list of his enemies was replenished with people from among the “dearest” who strive to be friends with everyone. This did not bother the English writer, because he, like other outstanding personalities, valued enemies. And there was a reason for it!

“If you constantly have luck, no matter how well-deserved it is, you will have enemies.” Andre Maurois

Enemies do not appear because you are so malicious, evil and aggressive. More precisely, if this is indeed inherent in the character, then their occurrence is unlikely to come as a surprise, since with such a character you are at enmity with the whole world and expect the same from it. But angelic kindness, heavenly beauty and divine talent are not a panacea for enemies. Rather, they are a guarantee that you will have ill-wishers.

The main reason for the enmity was and remains. And it appears when you have something very attractive that others do not have. For example, in your business you are a star, original and bright. Whether you sing or collect beads, the result is simply wow! Those around you admire, and some turn black with envy. And if it were possible, they would eradicate your talent to the last drop, but, as you know, you can’t drink it away. But you can destroy the carrier, which is what the adversaries begin to do zealously.

But even if you don't have the talent to deprive your colleagues of sleep and peace, you can still find something that touches others' hearts. Moreover, it also happens that envious people do not want to have this “something”, but simply so that you don’t have it!

As you know, a nail that rises above the surface is the first to attract a hammer - and so with “unexpected joy.” The reason for others to grind their teeth can be anything: luck, bright appearance, a beautiful voice or a dress in the “Dear Mom, you’ll rock” style. All of this could very well get in the way of someone’s throat. Becoming gray, boring and not aspiring to anything just because of fear of the enemy, as you understand, is not an option. It is better to take an example from great people and start treating enemies as real wealth.

Surprised? Enemies can be a profitable acquisition that helps make your life better. It would seem a paradox: after all, most of all, your enemies would like to deprive you of a good life. Remember: if they succeed, it means you don’t know how to use your enemies. And it’s worth using them! As soon as you learn how to do this, you will immediately feel the benefits of having them.

“Don't ask your friends about your shortcomings. Better find out what your enemies say about you.” SAADI

Well, who, if not this vile Kuzminishna from the fifth floor, will tell the whole entrance that when you sneeze, you don’t cover your mouth with your hand, every now and then you pull down your skirt (“which creeps up on her huge butt, she’s eaten about five kilograms over the winter - hee- hee!”) and constantly use the word “in short” in long speeches!

On the one hand, everything that your enemies talk about you must be divided by at least ten. On the other hand, precisely because they want to catch you at every little thing and are closely watching, it is useful to listen to their opinion. This way you kill two birds with one stone: firstly, you learn about your weak points and eliminate them, and secondly, you continue to keep yourself in shape. Thanks to Petrova, you paid attention to your manners, weight and speech, and at the same time noted how easy it is to offend you with such statements, and developed your ability to accept criticism with dignity. Complete benefit. Oh yes Petrova, “kind” soul!

"Oh God, make my enemies funny!" VOLTER

There is nothing more tiresome than enemies, whose petty mischief is embarrassing to react to. But if you can't help but notice your enemies, use them to lift your spirits. You can throw out everything on them: irritability accumulated due to bad weather, rudeness of passengers, broken heels. Swear with your enemies, express to their face everything that you think about them and are even afraid to think - in general, take out your everyday anger on them. And come to your loved ones calm and balanced. You can sharpen your wit on them. Speak to them in an emphatically calm and deadly sarcastic manner. Of course, the squabble can become endless, but if the opponent is worthy, learn barbs from him. It will be useful in life.

“If you want to rise, make enemies.” CHARLES TALLEYRAND

Enemies will not remain silent. They will sing your praises at all crossroads, because they will not be able to contain their irritation. And don’t let it bother you that the propaganda will be completely negative - a person who allows himself to have enemies already commands respect. So rumors about you will spread throughout Great Rus'... And the more ill-wishers you have, the more scandalous it will be. The scandals will interest a lot of the uninitiated. And first of all, these will be the enemies of your enemies, that is, your potential supporters and like-minded people. And friends must be valued. Having enemies, you understand this much more acutely.

“It could have been worse. Your enemy could be your friend." HEDGEHOG LEC

Anya believes that she and Dasha are inseparable. In new companies this is how she is introduced: “Dasha is my best friend.” And then she publicly makes critical remarks about the girl: about Dasha’s jokes - “what kind of nonsense are you talking about”, about her friend’s thick curly hair - “thank God, my hair is not like that, I don’t fiddle with a comb for two hours in the morning,” about Dasha’s men - “Your taste has always been strange.” Dasha often gets offended - and her “best friend” immediately rushes to the rescue: “Why are you so upset, stupid? It’s always unpleasant to hear the truth.” Anya doesn’t think about why strangers should also hear this “truth.” Speaking about Dasha with warm intonations, she manages to put her in such an unfavorable light that the girl to this day cannot make a single close friend among their mutual acquaintances. And Anya, on occasion, likes to note how sorry she is for Dasha, because no one wants to communicate with her except Anya, who is immensely patient and generous...

There is no worse enemy who pretends to be our friend. If only because it is not immediately clear that there is an enemy in front of you. If you are infatuated with a new acquaintance, and your half-forgotten old but faithful friends sing in chorus about danger, do not blame it on jealousy, think about it. Everything will fall into place as soon as you analyze what you get more from this relationship: understanding and care or unnecessary complexes and worries? If the latter prevails, drive the “friend” away from you. You are not the person at whose expense others assert themselves.

"A man who has no enemies is truly poor."

Bernard Show

Why do they appear? enemies? Not at all because you are angry, aggressive and very bad person. No, of course, if you are like that, there will definitely be enemies. Because if you perceive the world with hostility, then the world will respond in kind. But the irony is that even if you are a kind-hearted person, enemies they will still be there. And a lot!

That is basic the reason for the appearance of enemies? Envy. Just envy, black envy. Doesn't matter. When and why does envy appear? As the hero of A. Conan Doyle would say: “Elementary, Watson.”

Any of your skills, achievements or talents can cause envy among those who do not possess them. For example, you: write wonderful poetry, repair any equipment or cross-stitch, but as if you were born with this talent. Many people around you praise and appreciate you, but some...

Some puff with anger, they are simply bursting with envy. Do you think they dream of having a similar talent? No, they just want you not to have it. And since they are not able to destroy your gift, they try, and very zealously, to harm you personally in every possible way.

For example, Dasha has a wonderful mother who knits simply exclusive things. And all her colleagues envy Dasha’s berets, hats, sweaters, and gloves knitted by her mother’s hands. And although each of the envious women dresses even better and many of them buy clothes exclusively in fashion boutiques, they do not have such original things. As a result, the quiet, modest Dasha is hated by the entire female team. You can simply contact Dasha’s mom with your order. But where is it, the girl, her employees, are simply tormented with petty dirty tricks, then they spill tea on a sweater, or they throw a glove in a trash can. However, it doesn’t even occur to her that her outfits are to blame. Where are mom’s homemade creations compared to chic couture clothes?

Yes, anything - luck, bright appearance, a wonderful voice or an exclusive suit - there will always be an individual for whom it will be like a bone in the throat. You think the solution is that out of fear of enemies you need to become gray and invisible, to merge with the background. No, no and NO! My enemies are my wealth.

Do you think it was stupid? Let's figure it out. Can enemies make your life better? After all, it is obvious that your enemies have a passionate desire to ruin your life. However, if you allow them to do this, then you do not know how to use enemies for your benefit. This is the most interesting thing, being able to use enemies.

“A friend is dear to me, but an enemy can be useful: a friend respects what I am capable of, but an enemy will teach me what to do.”

F. Schiller

Can anyone, except this evil Valerik, sitting in the next office, spread throughout the office that you go to the smoking room more often than others, or report to the boss that you were a full five minutes late from lunch?

Firstly, everything that your enemies “talk” about you must be reduced by a factor of ten. Secondly, knowing that they are watching you and dreaming of catching you on something, it is useful to listen carefully to their poisonous and mocking remarks.

As a result, you will be informed about your weak points and will be able to eliminate them. Learn not to relax and keep yourself in shape. After all, thanks to the “kindest” Valerik, you found out that you smoke a lot and that your watch is five minutes behind. In addition, you will develop the ability to respond to criticism without unnecessary emotions.

“Hating your enemies is easier and more fun than loving your friends.”

Bertrand Russell

If you can't help but react to your enemies, try using them to create a positive attitude for yourself.

You can, for example, tell your to the enemy in person everything you think about him, of course in censored expressions. Throw out all the resentment and anger that you have accumulated during the day on him. But in the evening you will return to your family in a good and friendly mood.

You can come up with a joke, preferably without names, about your enemy and tell it to your colleagues during your lunch break. You'll laugh together.

You can, in a calm and poisonously sarcastic tone, start a kind of sparring match with your enemy, show off, so to speak, wit. And it doesn’t matter how long your argument with him will last, but you will definitely learn to say barbs.

“When I have no enemies, then I will understand that I am no longer worth anything.”

The more spiteful critics talk about you, even negative, even scandalous, the better. Human, enemyless, doesn't deserve respect. And if a person deserves respect, then soon the enemies of your enemies, having heard about you, will become your best friends.

"The enemy who pretends to be your friend is much more dangerous."

G. Skovoroda

The worst enemy the one who pretends friend. Such an enemy is very difficult to recognize.

If one of your new acquaintances has shielded all your old but devoted friends from you, and they unanimously warn of danger, do not think that jealousy is to blame. Take a look at your new relationship from the outside. What do you get more in this situation: understanding and warmth or worries and complexes? If you realize that the latter predominate, send your “friend” away.

Don't let others assert themselves at your expense. Choose your new friends carefully and take care of your existing ones. Popular wisdom is right:

"An old friend is better than two new ones".